Life is Crazy that Way...

We start out searching for a place in this crazy world. We travel sometimes to find it. We find people, friends, places and avenues that take us to new and different realms and levels of living. Sometimes, the work we do and who we work with gives us a feeling of stability. For some, it holds them and they are content forever. For others... like me, there is no content.
I am a writer. It is what I do. And this writer wants to travel. I want to be inspired by the things around me. I want to look at a house and see a new novel. I want to travel around, find a plac that inspires my soul and write. Stay there until I need more content and then find a new place. The world inspires me and sometimes, it is the very thing that blocks my thoughts and slows my writing. I think this is true of so many authors, perhaps more so in a fiction writer. More abstract their thoughts.
Love that touches your soul is a novel waiting to be written. There are moments when the love is confused and that life steps in and mixes up your emotions. This too is a novel in the writing. Loving and caring and sharing with someone the depths of your everything is a novel. Infusing into your writing your own lifes experiences I believe is a given. You draw from the things you have felt inside to write words of love and sharing, sadness and pain.
You see, home for me, as a writer, is where my shoes are set for the night. It is the place I sit and write. This wanderers heart, never truly content where he is, is the heart, I do believe of every writer. Seeing the world through story telling eyes. A writer lives inside their novels. Their very essence tranfers to the book and things they only dream of happening can and do come to life at the touch of a keyboard. And so I wonder... How is it that a writer finds contentment? What is out there that will cause a writer to call his/her house their home? I have not found it yet, not even in my novels. And so... I continue my search.

Write to forget??? An Oxymoron?????

WWriting... something we all do at one time or another but for different reasons. Some write to remember. We write our memoirs and our diaries of everything important that happens to us as we grow up. If it begins to fade a bit from our thoughts or memories, we need only to turn a few pages and we are there again. There are also those that write to forget or transform something painful and make it less destructing of our hearts. That may not make sense but trust me, it is real. Maybe that statement deserves or even screams for an explanation. The statement itself almost takes on the appearance of an Oxymoron. If you write about something, it seems a little doubtful that you are going to forget it. I think differently. Depending on how you write or what image you put it into.
Imagine if you will, you as a child. A hundred things scared us as children. There were the shadows on the wall and the sounds just outside our windows. A noise in the night that sounded too much like "monsters" under our bed. "Monsters Inc" made that very apparent to us all. A Little Sully or Mike scratching around in the closet would send any kid into their mommy and daddies room for the night. As that child grew, he took those "monsters" and made them fuzzballs or dust bunnies and the scarey creatures no longer existed. They were transformed into something that could not hurt us.
Take that same idea and place it on a life happening. The loss of a friend or a loved one is both scarey and painful. To deal with the sorrow and the feelings that steal sleep and cause us to wander far away in our minds is nearly impossible. We do whatever we can to lessen the pain that wracks our souls. We get busy with projects. We surround our selves with new friends or travel to places we did not travel while we were with that loved one. that, is a little like drinking 4 or 5 whiskey sours. It dulls the memory and pain while the whiskey works but then, in the end, the pain is there when we wake. The only difference is we have a headache to remind us of what we did.
And writing can do what? Taking the sorrow and the pain of remembering we lost someone we love very much and transforming it in type to good memories or lessons in life can help to allow you not to go back to the loss quite as often. Remembering the good times and putting them down on paper, or in most cases today, on screen, does help to forget. Not to forget the one we love so much. That I believe is not something that will happen. But to see the happiness that was shared gives us cause to smile. As we smile more, we cry less. Funny things we shared with that loved one brings a different memory to fill in where the sadness was.
We have the abilty to create stories that have a different ending. We can reach into our hearts and from those tears, turn the ending to one of joy. Writing is with out a doubt, theraputic. It gives us a place to go so that our hearts and minds have a chance to heal some. It opens new avenues and tells us that life has gone on and that you Are going to some how survive. The wonderful thing about writing is that we can meld with the words and go to another place where the sorrows are filled with smiles. We can write with a passion, so fast that we forget the real reason were writing. And the best part of it all... you won't wake with a headache.
Take your sadness and make them something new. Remember all the good times. Let your mind wander to when you were happy. The monsters are only under your bed as long as you allow them to be. No Alligator is going to bite your hand and no "Chucky" doll is going to drag you under the bed, unless you continue to believe that it will. As I wrote this, I remembered the beauty of a love eternal. I thought about what made me smile and... I smiled. Writing to forget really isn't as Oxymoronic as one might think. It won't rob you of your memories. It simply makes them a little nicer to sleep with.

To the Miners in West Virginia... God Be with you All

I was reading my last blog and suddenly, I felt a little shame come over me. I was thinking about a cup of coffee and a donut. And then I thought about how truly trivial that sounds when compared to what is happening in West Virginia right now. A dear friend of almost 15 years and her family sit somewhere outside of a mine that had an explosion 3 days ago. To date 25 miners are known to be dead. Four remain trapped inside of the mine. Where, they are unsure. Alive? Also unsure. There are pods that they can reach for safety but it is not known if the last four found their way to it.
I take this moment and this space on my blog site and dedicate it to the 25 people that have died and to those that remain in question. The family that is dear to our home waits outside the mine, hoping, praying, that their husband, father, friend, brother... All that he is to these people, is safe somewhere inside. I pray for them and cry for them and believe with them, as it must be. Families go down into the mines every single day, knowing the dangers and yet also knowing that it is the only way to feed their loved ones or keep them in clothing and a home. I read the words of some that say "Why would they want to work in such a place?" Why? Because it is where they have made their living for generations. It is what they know and what they do to survive.
I say "God Bless" them and God bless and be with the families that have lost their loved ones. I also say "Pray" for those that still wait, a cup of coffee or a donut so very terribly irrelevant to them right now. I offer my love and caring and prayers for the families of the miners and pray God brings to them some measure of peace and strength through what I can Only imagine has to be the most terrifying moments of their lives. God Bless you My friend and God Bless the Miners.

How do You define "comfortable?"

What really does it mean to be "comfortable? I hear people say all the time, "I don't need to be a millionaire, I just want to live comfortably." I sit back and think about what that means. I am sure it means something a bit different to everyone. I will be the first to admit that a Million dollars WOULD make me feel comfortable. ;) But the truth is that the measure of being comfortable is as simple as this to me. I want to have enough money that all of my bills are paid with out hesitation. I want to own a nice vehicle and have plenty to eat. I have all three of those things. So am I "comfortable?" No, I do not consider myself comfortable when it comes to actual cash flow. I am certainly Not without, but not rich by any standards. So what do I consider to be really comfortable?
I love coffee. I crave and trust me, lol, I Need coffee in the morning to turn from "Mr. Hyde" back to myself. I enjoy donuts now and then. Perhaps, according to my "not as trim as I would like" physique, I enjoy them a bit too often. At ant rate, I enjoy things that are not so huge but that make me smile. There are mornings that I do not have the 3 dollars it takes to grab a coffee and donut. When that happens, it is not my stomach Nor my Physique that suffer. It is my mind. I work to keep money flowing from the sale of my novels and Internet work. I bring in a nice income and live nicely. But those times, which everyone I think has or has had somewhere in their lives, that I reach in my pocket and realize I do not have the funds to grab that coffee and donut are what separate me from living nicely and living comfortable.
So, when someone asks me what I define as a "comfortable" living... I say a hot cup of coffee and a cake donut, anytime I want. Silly? Simple? Too much to ask for? Well, I don't really know how to answer that but I do know that it is what I measure where I am with my life.

A Sign of the times...

Watching the news, I can not help but wonder where it is we are going in this world. Who will be held accountable for the things that are happening? I read about the scientist that are playing with the atom. Perhaps "playing" is a bad word to use as there is nothing fun nor o.k. with what they are doing. Their machine, that can create a powerful beam that is stronger, more devistating than 100 Nuclear Missles, has been tested again! It thrilled them to know they are so close to full strength. This machine has the potential to pull, through it's powerful magenetics, planets and atsroids from space and lay them right in our front yard!
Called by many, the "Doomsday Machine," it has all the needed power to destroy our planet and yet... we continue to tease fate. Under ground in a remote area of Switszerland lies a creation that man should step away from. 2012, the year set for the real test. A "test" that could jeapordise our very existance. Strange that it is the same time, predicted according to the scolars by the Mayan calender to be the end of times.And then... who will be responsible? Who will have to stand up and say "I did that!?" Are we really, as the {most intelligient} species, really too smart for our own safety????